I'm sure times were tough, but could you really not do better than a giant pencil to the junk?
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A window cleaner died after repeatedly stabbing himself in the leg with a giant pencil. Jeffrey Burton's body was found in a blood soaked room at his home in St Leonards with a gash to his upper right thigh and an oversized souvenir pencil covered in blood next to his ankle.
A window cleaner died after repeatedly stabbing himself in the leg with a giant pencil. Jeffrey Burton's body was found in a blood soaked room at his home in St Leonards with a gash to his upper right thigh and an oversized souvenir pencil covered in blood next to his ankle.

Love the picture.
What happened to wrapping your lips around the barrel of a gun?